Solano only gets time for the briefest of solos with Blyth Spartans

While Newcastle may be the latest and most high-profile club in the north-east of England to be linked with an autocratic foreign state renowned for its laissez-faire attitude towards human rights abuses, they certainly weren’t the first. Fans who rocked up to Croft Park to watch Blyth Spartans’ 2-2 draw with Spennymoor in the National League North on Boxing Day 2018 were somewhat surprised to see a new pitchside advertising hoarding imploring them to “Visit North Korea”. Paid for by a student in the University of Sunderland who had a side-hustle organising tourist excursions to the world’s most secretive country, it is not known how many of those fans present that day have since visited Pyongyang. It is unlikely to have been many considering one among their number told the Newcastle Chronicle “you’d struggle to get anyone to visit Ashington in here, never mind the People’s Republic of North Korea”.
Now in the Northern Premier League Premier Division, the seventh tier of English football, Blyth have made headlines again after sacking Nobby Solano from his job as their manager just six games into the season. The Peruvian, a former Newcastle midfielder and cult hero who achieved near-national treasure status among fans when it was discovered he could play a mean trumpet, was only appointed Blyth manager in May but was winless after six matches, three of which ended in defeat, leaving his side second from bottom of the table.
Famous for the time he hid in some bushes and repeatedly interrupted an increasingly exasperated Bobby Robson training-ground huddle with long and loud toots on his horn, Nobby has unfortunately been cut loose from his own managerial role and will now have more time to devote to his solos. His former assistant David Stockdale, the “big-hearted, straight-talking and fun” former Brighton and Fulham goalkeeper, will take charge for this weekend’s FA Cup qualifying clash with Campion. “The club would like to place on record its thanks to Nobby for his efforts while at Spartans,” trumpeted a club statement, soundtracked by the mellifluous strains of Chet Baker’s Lullaby of the Leaves.
Meanwhile down by the River Trent, Solano’s beloved Newcastle are due to take on Nottingham Forest at the City Ground in one of the ties of the Fizzy Cup second round and will almost certainly welcome back Sandro Tonali, who is eligible to play for them again after a 10-month stint on the Naughty Step incurred for falling foul of betting regulations. The Italian, who has since admitted to having a gambling addiction, spent some of his time out helping other problem punters and warning academy players in his native Italy of the perils and pitfalls of betting, but will no doubt be delighted to finally get back out on to the pitch. “I think we’ll get a different player back, a stronger player mentally, someone who will enjoy his football and probably appreciate every moment because it has been taken away from him for a long period of time,” tooted Eddie Howe in the buildup to the 24-year-old’s return from his punitive suspension. Football being football, here’s hoping the Italian won’t be too distracted by the bright and colourful electronic signs advertising various gambling firms on all four sides of the pitch.
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